"Merry Christmas, Lucas," Captain Bridger says cheerily as I walk by him in the Mess Hall. Jeez, why has he been saying that to me all week? It's not as though he's not going to see me on Christmas itself. Of course he will; I live here, he lives here, we're going to see each other Christmas Day. He's going to want to "bond" or something. Ask about my parents. I dunno, try to get me to tell him something I haven't already told him. Well, I'm not going to. I don't care if it's Christmas and I just turned 17 and my parents haven't even had the decency to call, I'm not going to whine at Bridger about how miserable I am. Because I'm not miserable. Everyone expects me to be, but I'm not. I'm actually quite happy with the way the past year has gone.
What right do I have to be miserable when I've had such a terrific year here? I thought I was gonna hate it, but I don't hate it at all. I made a lot of good friends - Ben, Doc Westphalen, Migs, Tim, Darwin - way more than I woulda if I had stayed at home. My work actually means something here, people listen to me, care about what I'm talking about - provided I'm talking to them at a time when they're not trying to do something involving the military (namely, anything in which Commander Ford is present.)
If I were home, I'd be eating cold, left-over takeout Chinese food from the only restaurant on Grand Island (we go into Buffalo when we want to really eat. Or rather - my parents go into Buffalo, or my father goes into Buffalo. I usually end up being left at home.) I'd be up in my room, by myself, eating lo mein from the carton and calculating how long it would be until I turn 18 and could move out. Christmas never really was Christmas at my house. All the other houses on the Island had decorations and lights up, and ours- we didn't even have a tree most of the time. I tried stringing up lights one year, but we have a really high roof and no ladders that reach high enough so I had to climb up on the roof and I nearly got killed. Never tried that again.
The thing is, I really wanted to be like all the other families on the Island. They were all caroling and laughing and having a really great time, and there I was in my big house all alone. It didn't matter that we had the biggest house on the Island, or if my dad owned the entirty of the Niagra Falls hydroelectric power facilities. It didn't matter 'cause no one was ever home. Except me. We didn't celebrate anything. We didn't even speak to each other for the most part. If anyone was around to listen then, they'd know I was miserable.
But here- compared to where I was, this is Heaven. People are friendly and happy and they don't bite each others' heads off if someone looks at them the wrong way. And no God-awful leftover Chinese food. I think that's the most important part. People here have their own lives, but they're not so busy that they completely ignore the holidays. It's such a huge change from my "other" life. I like it.
I know a lot of the crew is keeping their distance from me during this time of year, because they think I'm upset and they don't want to make me even more upset. But even though I haven't heard from my parents, even though they're ignoring the Christmas season again, I'm more happy then I have been in years.
I realize as I pick up a tray of- (well, I'm not quite sure what it is, but it isn't lo mein, so it can't be too bad), that I really don't mind if Bridger wants to spend some time with me tomorrow. In fact, I'm kind of looking forward to it. I walk over to the table he's sharing with Commander Ford and Doc Westphalen (how they are sitting there without killing each other, I don't know). "Can I sit here?"
Bridger nods, motioning to an empty seat. I sit. "Merry Christmas, Captain," I tell him.